Common Questions

Spiritual direction is a gentle, guided conversation that helps a person notice and respond to God's presence in their life. It is not giving advice or solving problems, but listening deeply together, through silence, prayer, and reflection. A spiritual director accompanies someone in their journey, helping them become more aware of their inner life, their relationship with God, and how they are being lovingly led forward.

A spiritual director does not literally "direct" you, so to speak. He refrains from advice-giving and does not seek to "fix" a directee or control the outcome of the conversations. Rather, the director always seeks to honor the journey of the directee as uniquely theirs. The director does, however, discern with the directee the movement of God's Spirit in their life. Jefry is trained by CenterQuest, which advocates the contemplative-evocative stance in the spiritual direction process.

A typical direction session looks like two people talking, with pauses throughout the conversation for silence, reflection, and going deeper. A typical meeting lasts for 45 to 60 minutes and occurs at least once a month. It will often start with silence or a brief centering exercise, and then the content of the meeting will be whatever is arising from the directee's life that seems interesting to explore further. The director will mostly listen, reflect back what they are hearing, ask questions to help go deeper, and make space for discernment together about the invitations arising from the directee's life.

A spiritual director is not a counselor, coach, teacher, mentor, or even an advisor. Rather than getting to the root of your behavior (why), or formulating a growth plan (how), spiritual direction provides focused time to process what feels most important right now and experience God's love, presence, and leading in the midst of it. Although the one-on-one nature of spiritual direction can look a lot like therapy, pastoral counseling, or life coaching, it is actually quite different. Spiritual direction is not "problem" centered, but rather "life", "prayer", and "growth" centered, and is not sought only in times of crisis or transition.

Spiritual direction is for anyone who wants to grow in their relationship with God and to experience God's love and presence in their lives. It is for youth in their life's questions and transition, professionals, married couples navigating relationships, parents, non-profit workers, ministry leaders, and pastors who want a set-aside time with a trained spiritual director who is ready to help you make sense of your spiritual journey and spend quality time with your deeper desires.

Jefry does not charge a fixed fee for spiritual direction. His ministry operates on a voluntary offering model, a gift given freely by directees to help sustain the work. This approach reflects his conviction that spiritual companionship is a ministry, not a transaction. No one is turned away for inability to give.

Yes, Jefry does have a covenant he will ask you to sign after you've tried a session, if you'd like to continue meeting. This document explains meeting expectations, the limits of confidentiality, and asks for an emergency contact.

Yes! Although many love the dynamics of spiritual direction, it can still take some getting used to. You can set up a free 20-minute consultation to talk more about it, and then decide whether you want to schedule a session, with no expectation of having something ongoing.